This past month in my life has been BANANAS! We’ve had multiple things break and require repairs in our home that have required us to contact our homeowner’s insurance and have people in and out. In addition to that, I also started back at work, which I am excited about because I enjoy my work and the money is nice, however, it has made things crazy juggling all of the home repair, the normal home stuff, and work. Then this past week I got a virus from my son’s childcare that has me off work for a week straight and hiding in the bedroom trying not to infect my family. It has felt like a lot of stuff all at once. It has been overwhelming.
I’ve realized I’ve allowed myself to slip into a negative mindset. I say things to myself like – “Well, I didn’t get to practice my back at work routines a week early as I wanted, so now I’ll never figure out how to keep the house clean and go to work.” or “All of this stuff keeps happening to mess up the house, might as well not even care about it” or, and I’m a little ashamed to admit this one “Why does all of this keep happening to me, my life is so horrible right now”. Y’all, my life is FAR FROM HORRIBLE. I have a great understanding job, a happy baby boy, a house to live in, food to eat and a spouse who has been a huge pillar of strength during all of this. I have a great life. Sure, things haven’t happened quite as planned recently, but life, in general, is good.
This is the danger of a negative mindset. It causes us to look at our situation and only see the bad. It causes us to MAGNIFY the bad at the expense of all the good that is actually there. If we can notice when we are having negative thoughts we can stop ourselves and shift our mindset. This is the key to self-care in the midst of the chaos.
Bubble baths and yoga aren’t going to fix a broken mindset.
Here are 5 things that can help.
- Give yourself permission to throw a 5-minute pity party, then stop. Pick yourself up. Realize that you are more powerful and more blessed than you’ve been letting yourself believe. Sure, life has been chaotic and stressful, but we aren’t going to wallow in that all day. Give yourself a few minutes to feel your feelings, or heck, give yourself an evening if you need it. But once that time is over, stop. Wallowing in self-pity does nothing to improve your mood or your situation. It only serves to make you feel bad about yourself and your life.
- Find Gratitude. I feel like I talk about gratitude a lot, but guys, it’s because it works. It’s so powerful. Instead of focusing on all the things that are wrong, focus on the things you are grateful for that are right. Shift your mindset. Shift your thinking. Choose gratitude.
- SPEAK TRUTH OVER YOUR LIFE. Get yourself some scripture. Find some positive affirmations. Repeat it over yourself and your life multiple times per day. Stand in front of a mirror to talk to yourself out loud in your car. Our words have power. If you take the time to speak truth over yourself and your life it will shift your mindset.
- Get out of your own head. Go have coffee with some friends. Go volunteer somewhere. Take your babies to the park and run around and play. Get out of your head where all of the negativity is and try to see life through someone else’s eyes for a second. Do you have a toddler? If so, take them outside and let them explore. Watch how fascinated and excited they get over the small rock or leaf they find. Let yourself be apart of that joy. Turn off your phone. Don’t check your email. Don’t even play a podcast. Just be present and enjoy the moment.
- Remember, this is temporary. Most things in our life aren’t going to be that way forever. This past week as I’ve been sick with this virus I remember thinking to myself “I’m never going to be able to do anything around the house ever again”. How ridiculous is that? But, that statement represents how easy it is for us to take a temporary situation and let it control our mindset like it’s forever. Most things don’t last forever. Most hard seasons come to an end. Try to find the light at the end of the tunnel or even the light amidst the hardships.
Our thoughts and our mindset literally shape our entire day. Our words have so much power. Try to remember that today and take charge of your mindset.
Remember, you deserve love and the time it takes to love yourself well!
The Self Care Lady